Sunday, April 19, 2015

Thinking Of You



I'm suddenly missing of three of you so badly. My thoughts turn to you when I least expect it, and sometimes the feeling is just so overwhelming, that tears start to well up in my eyes and I would just start sobbing. 

Not a day goes by that I do not think about the three of you. I would sometimes ask myself, how different would our lives be had either one of you, or all three of you, are alive today with us. Sometimes I would wonder, are you happy? Are you well taken care of? Have you found each other? Are you loved?

I know these questions are futile, but one can't help but wonder at times. I'm sorry I cannot be there to watch you grow. I'm sorry I cannot be there to cuddle and hold you when you're afraid of the dark. I'm sorry I cannot be there to take you to kindergarten or to walk to you to school, or take you to the play ground and watch you swing as high as you can to reach the skies. I'm sorry if my body wasn't able to sustain you long enough for you come into this world, I tried. I'm sorry if you're angry with me, I'm sorry you didn't choose me. I hope that wherever the three of you are, I want you to know that I hope that the three of you have found loving homes, and will always, always be happy. I love you.

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